I fell in to love today.
I hadn’t realized that I didn’t know what it really was to fall in to love until that moment.
The moment I looked in the mirror and said I’m afraid.
I’m afraid to fail.
I’m afraid to commit myself.
I’m afraid to let go of controlling how it all will go.
I’m afraid to ask of someone else to let me see myself in him.
And I let myself be afraid.
And I saw what it looks like to be alone.
And what I had done thus far to make sure that the me I truly am was kept alone.
To be safe.
And it was dark.
And it was frightening.
And there was no one.
And I was beautiful.
I was untouched and unscathed and as calm and peaceful and free as a fairy.
And then I invited myself to come out in to the world.
And breathe in the life around me.
And to stop hiding in that dark, frightening, alone place.
And I took my hand and guided myself into the light. Into the warm, open and energetic place.
And a flood of hope and peace and care surrounded me and embraced me.
And I looked at myself.
She smiled and said ‘I love you’.
Then she melted into me and I no longer saw where who I am ended and all of this fear and aloneness began. And then I noticed that I wasn’t afraid and I wasn’t alone.
I’d accepted love as company.
And she and I, now one, opened our eyes and saw that everything around us and every one was love. Like a mirror, reflecting an untouched, unscathed, peaceful, calm and free being.
Because love doesn’t get harmed.
It is always at peace.
It is always calm.
It is always free.
And it is always there waiting patiently to be unlocked from the dark, frightening place we keep it hidden.
Fearing we might lose the one thing we can never lose.
Because we are love.
And love is free.
Free is love.
We can give it and give it and we never lose.
Because It’s all there is.
It is the source of everything.
It is the place where we begin, where we grow and we thrive and when we are gone we let it go to be in the world where we found it when we arrived.
Love is a gift we never lose. We are free to be and use that gift whenever we choose.
It never fades.
It never dies.
So I fell into love today, right into it. In the most remarkable of places. Right there inside me and everywhere…
Wanting, asking, needing to be loved.
The most beautiful thing that we are entitled to as human beings.
No need to fear.
Just open your eyes.